Judge John Hodgman on What to Do With Takeout Sauce Packets

November 30, 2023
Dining & Wine
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Mathew writes: Please order my wife to stop hoarding takeout sauce packets. They get scattered through our pantry in case someone wants to use them someday. No one ever does. But I get in trouble if she catches me throwing them out.

These packets are trash at their inception, so there is something extra unseemly wasteful about completing their trip to the dump without even squeezing them. But your wife is doing it wrong. Anyone who indulges in takeout knows those packets must be consolidated into one kitchen drawer or one designated sauce jar — it’s the only way to monitor the infestation. But it’s better to be proactive. Refuse the packets at the source and cook more at home. As for your current stash, I order you to design a week’s worth of menus around your packet collection and use ’em up.

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